Study, Ireland, Lecture, Ireland, Everywhere, Ireland

I learned about Giffen goods in Microeconomics today. They are goods that people buy more of when the price goes up and less of when the price goes down. There is only one recorded Giffen good in recent history. According to Dr. Sohng, it was the potato during the Irish potato famine. I know it's not a reliable source but, Wikipedia says otherwise:

Great Famine in Ireland

Potatoes during the Irish Great Famine were long believed to be the only example of a Giffen good. But this theory was debunked by Gerald P. Dwyer and Cotton M. Lindsey in their 1984 article Robert Giffen and the Irish Potato[3][4], where they showed the contradicting nature of the Giffen "legend" with respect to historical evidence.

The Giffen nature of the Irish potato was also later discredited by Sherwin Rosen of the University of Chicago in his 1999 paper Potato Paradoxes[5]. Rosen showed that the phenomenon could be explained by a normal demand model.

I still was slightly taken off guard by the whole thing and as usual had that overwhelming "I can't believe some other reference to Ireland came up this week" moment.

While studying copious amounts of material that I will never remember for Comparative Economics, I came across a reference to politics and Labour Parties. We discussed the fact, and I've noted, that in the UK and Ireland Labour Parties are considered actual political parties.

I keep coming across various headlines in The Economist that deal with Ireland, also ads for Innovation in Ireland.

I presented at Study Abroad Club this week. My audience was small, but it did me good to talk about it. I talked to a friend after about how it went and when I hung with him a mixture of stress relief from being done with it, exhaustion, and longing hit me in a small bout of tears. I'm just wondering how long this is going to go on for. The only thing I can really equate it to is heartbreak, but with a country, it's people, culture, customs, way of life, etc., instead of with a person.

One of the hardest things for me to come to grips with is the alienation part of reverse culture shock. Sure I felt super alienated when I first arrived in Ireland, but after a couple of weeks I stopped clinging to everything American and started to accept everything Irish. Part of the appeal of being overseas was the anonymity of it all. I was ok with feeling alone because no one knew me, there was no expectation, quite a bit of independence. Now that I'm home I find myself expecting more of people than I should which is frustrating. I missed out on things while I was gone and having had the experiences I did alienates me further as not many people can relate. When I find someone who has studied abroad, the conversation is like a rare gem. I want to hold onto it for safe keeping but I know I have to spread my fingers and let it fall through eventually because life stops for no one, especially college students with exams.

I'm getting antsy to go somewhere, anywhere. I wish I could afford to go back to Dublin, live there, go to other places in Europe on holiday. The only thing is I have family and friends I care about here. I'm having trouble defining what is important. Also while studying for Comparative I came across Skinner. We discussed him in class and his idea that we aren't free, we are influenced by the media, people, and the environment. They tell us what we want, we don't decide, we follow a trend.

You only get one life to live. So what do you do with it? Do you surround yourself with family and friends in your native country? Do you go to a foreign country and thrive on learning about a new culture and how people live life there?

When I was in Ireland I was so sure of what I wanted out of life. Now I'm not so sure and that scares me a bit.

Irish Google

My Google page thinks I'm still in Ireland. It comes up as www.google.ie and offers to switch to Gaeilge. Also I can search the web or pages from Ireland. This is grand.

"Not many people can do what you did. Don't take yourself for granted." -Dr. Trejos

You're Only Lonely

Despite my attempts to take steps forward back into life in America, this week has set me back quite a bit, probably by kilometers. I can't stop thinking about Ireland, everywhere I turn something reminds me of it. Even little things like Clarion changing our email over to Windows Live, which is the same email service I had at DBS. This week I've been missing various things. It probably all started with Google's Superbowl commercial deals with a student searching study abroad programs in Paris, France and ends with him falling in love with a French girl and moving there. I've also been working on my presentation for study abroad club this Monday, which brings all kind of memories flooding back. I made tea for the first time this week since break and all I could think was how good some 39 cent custard creams from Dunnes would taste with it. The piles of snow we received this week reminded me of how Ireland doesn't get snow.

Wednesday night I was doing just fine and then out of nowhere I was hit with an overwhelming feeling of loss and the impossibility of being able to go to Ireland at that exact moment. I'm quite fine when I'm distracted by school work or the cleaning of my apartment, but as soon as I stop it hits me. From that point I just had a hard time picking myself up again (something I have actually gotten quite good at). I think it would help if I had someone to help pick me up every now and then, but that just isn't in the cards right now. It would also help if I had some of my friends from Dublin close, but the closest are about 5 hours away. Sometimes it's difficult to believe it all ever happened without the validation of others. I have pictures, stories, and memories but it's difficult when no one really appreciates them.

Last night was even lower than Wednesday. It's like I fell and I just could stand up again. Every time I stopped crying, the tears decided to make another entrance. After a brief late night call to my mum, I decided I need to be home for the weekend. I was blaming part of my hysterics on a lack of sleep, but even with a full 8 hours plus last night, I still feel just as emotionally ridiculous.

Today I rode the bus for about 20-25 minutes back to my apartment, mainly because it circled downtown Clarion and campus. It is no where near as crowded as Dublin Bus, there are no stairs to an upper saloon, no one who rides it has an Irish accent, and it requires absolutely no skill to maneuver. Most students get on and at the most are on their mobile phone or listening to their ipod, maybe studying for a test. I am probably the only one who busts out a book or sudoku, which makes me feel like a seasoned traveler. Seasoned traveler's don't waste much time while on modes of transportation, they are emailing on their blackberry, reading the latest headlines in today's paper, reading a book on the NY Times Bestseller list, among various other activities to fill the time during a commute. I feel like a whole other breed completely.

According to this site, http://www.studentsabroad.com/reentrycultureshock.html, I'm in stage 3 of reverse culture shock.

"This is often one of the transitions to Stage 3. You may experience feelings of frustration, anger, alienation, loneliness, disorientation, and helplessness and not understand exactly why. You might quickly become irritated or critical of others and of U.S. culture. Depression, feeling like a stranger at home, and the longing to go back abroad are also not uncommon reactions. You may also feel less independent than you were while abroad."

I'm not necessarily angry, but everything else I definitely am. I just want someone to relate to. Some sense of familiarity with the life I lived abroad. Patrick is quite optimisic about going back, which gives me hope. I also heard from Mary, my host mum, which is helpful. It's good to know I have contacts in Ireland, and I quote "I don't know how many people were asking for you - Triona, Judith, Ruth, Aoife. They all really enjoyed your lovely gentle presence. I hope that all is well with you back at College and that your family are well." I miss Mary and her friends and family very much, they're my Irish family. I miss the American friends I made there too, I felt like they understood me. They all had this sense of adventure and the want to travel and explore. In a way they were my Irish family too, Americans acclimatized to Irish life. Well as my mum is going to be here momentarily, I best be signing off. Hopefully optimism will strike me before I post next.

Carcassonne, France

It's been over two months ago since I went to France, but here is the blog post better late than never:

December 4, 2009 I got on the earliest bus out of Harold's Cross that was headed to the airport so I could meet Casey and Abby so we could head to Carcassonne, France. The airport we flew into was quite small and none of us had bothered to look up how we would get transportation from the airport into the town. When we stepped outside it was raining and luckily there was a bus right outside waiting. For €5 each we were able to take the 10 minute bus ride in. The bus driver informed us that he would be stopping at the train station and he would then take those of us staying to respective hotels. Abby, Casey and I were in the back of the bus so when we got to the station they nominated me, as I had the guesthouse information, to go up and tell him the address. Coincidentally there was a woman from Ireland who was taking a weekend holiday as well and she was staying in the Millet Guesthouse too. The bus driver pointed us in the right direction and we got off and wandered down some pretty deserted streets. A bit of wandering and trying to figure out the numbering on the doors led us to the right place.

Mei and Richard greeted us when we rang the doorbell and then ushered us up to the second floor. We entered the dining area and they seated us around a table to finalize our payments. It was then that we learned our friend's name, Angie. John and Mae also gave us maps of the area along with suggestions for things to do. After dropping off our bags and freshening up a bit we decided to start our short trek toward the castle. Being a small out of the way town, not a whole lot was going on even though it was a Friday night. We would find a lot more people in the area Sunday who made day trips to visit. We checked out some shops and settled for a small French pub within the castle walls for dinner that night. Casey and Abby both had French Onion Soup, which Abby let me try and it was delicious. I had a ham and cheese baguette which was really good too. We celebrated our girls night with sangria and stories for about 5 hours. We finished the night off with cake and a hefty tip for our waiter for having one of his tables occupied the entire night. We did make sure periodically that we weren't holding anyone up but there were always free tables. The walk back was a bit rainy but we had fun with it, dancing and whatnot which made it go a lot faster than the walk up to the castle.

Saturday we got on a train to Montpellier. It was really nice to see some of the French countryside and a train was the best way to do it. We obviously stuck out because a couple of French girls about our age asked us where we were from and what in the world were we doing in that part of France. We just laughed and told them we were traveling and exploring, I'm sure they thought we were crazy. It's really no different from when I ask people why they have come to Franklin or Clarion, but we tend to take the places we live in and know for granted whereas those visiting are able to see it through brand new eyes. There was a Christmas market going on in town so we perused the stands before going to the Musée Fabre. They had a fantastic exhibit of work done by Jean Raoux, a Montpellier artist who influenced the history of French art in the XVIIIth century. I was able to gather most of what I needed from the explanations in French that were posted on the wall. The language barrier in and of itself made me really wish that our language programs in elementary and secondary school were better or even existent for that matter. If I can manage it, I'm definitely picking up a language, probably Spanish, while I'm still in school. After the museum we grabbed sandwiches on baguettes and I even got a delicious raspberry tart. We explored the city a bit more before catching our train back to Carcassonne.

Sunday we decided to head back up to the castle. We spent the day perusing shops and dodging other tourists. There was a band that walked around to different areas of the castle and they seriously played all day. They must have been exhausted, but they had quite a following audience. Alongside them were a couple of men on stilts and a couple of other men puppeteering giant sized puppets. That evening we ate at a restaurant which wasn’t very busy and the owner spoke very little English. What he did say to us dealt a lot with American movie stars which was quite an entertaining way to have someone relate to us. After dinner we were exhausted so we turned in for an early night. At that point I was itching to just get back to Dublin. I was quite excited on Monday when we headed for the airport with Angie. The flight was just over two hours but it felt like forever. When we touched down at Dublin Airport I got this overwhelming feeling that I was home. I was so excited I could barely contain myself. I waited for the 16A bus back into Harold’s Cross and I revelled in the fact that I could call this country, that had been foreign a mere three months before, home.

Every word you say I think I should write down

I'm in a very Irish mood today. I wrapped myself up in my wool Irish scarf for class, which I do every day but that is beside the point, I bought the film Once for $6.99 today in the campus bookstore, and I've been listening to The Script like no one's business. If I had my Irish blanket I would wrap up in it for my Friday afternoon nap, but alas it is at home on my desk chair so my fleece blanket will have to suffice for now. It's days like these that it would be best if I just locked myself in my room and didn't come out. The only acceptable reason to emerge is if someone Irish was in town or if one of my American acclimatized Irish friends came to visit. For now I have to settle for what I have and pick myself up like always. There is no sense in lying down and missing what is going on around me, but I do like to take a few hours every now and then to think of the city I lived in for a semester.

So it's about 10 hours since I left this. Quite a bit of snow has fallen and I've just returned from seeing Dear John with a couple of good friends. I can't say that I was impressed with the movie. I read the book two years ago but I don't remember the plot line whatsoever. I can say that the only time I cried was at a father-son moment and not even in the chicky romance parts. Also Schuyler Fisk strikes this blog a second time as her duet with Joshua Radin called Paperweight was played more than once during the film and then again at the beginning of the credits. It is now on repeat on my itunes as I sit in the dark in my pajamas in the kitchen with the blinds open so I can see the snow falling against the glow of the street light. I don't exactly know what to say aside from that other than the fact is what I want out of life changes daily and I'm not sure how to cope with it. My uncertainty is the only sure thing for me right now.

Movies always make me super contemplative, unless it's The Hangover. In a round about way I'm going to blame my parents for this, and by blame I should really say credit them. They taught me when I was younger, and I heard it time and time again, that you should be nice to everyone. Sounds like a simple concept, but over the years it has become quite complex. Being nice is not only an act to someone's face but also the thoughts you have in your mind once walking away from them. Everyone judges, I do my fair share, but I have been trying to give people the benefit of the doubt. For real we know very few people well in our lives, and even those that we know well are holding vaults of information inside of them that we may never have access to.

This brings me to a time in Dublin when I was standing in front of the entrance to St. Stephen's Green with a friend and we were just watching tons of people go by. He looked at me and said, "Isn't it crazy to think that all of these people, their lives are just as real to them as our's are to us? We will never know them they won't matter in our lives, to us they're just passing by on the street." I think it's important to consider this and take it into account when actually encountering people. Their life may mean nothing to you, but it means everything to them. A three second or three minute encounter may be all you get in this lifetime but life is made up with many of those. I guess at this point I just wish I had more people in my life that I could be close to instead of just catching up on occasion. I'm in the process of finding myself and what I want, but sometimes it gets a bit lonely and I get quite bored of myself to be honest. I rather enjoy hearing about someone's day or week and looking beyond myself. I like to think that reading about the rest of the world does that, but print on paper only goes so far. This all goes back to what I wrote the other day; I need to focus on the people in my life more than I have been lately. I may not always show it, but they do mean the world to me, they are my world and I love them.

Work In Progress

So I've been thinking about a lot lately and meaning to write it all down but I just never have the motivation at the end of the day, so perhaps if I have a blog I can have more drive to keep it updated. I should probably start off by saying that the title for this blog comes from a song sung by Schuyler Fisk called From Where I'm Standing. You should probably just look her up, she's absolutely amazing and she's my favorite.

Next is my motivation to do anything beyond school work or cleaning my apartment. After spending a semester in Ireland I was a bit concerned about my productivity coming back, but I've been quite fine with it. The problem with my motivation comes in when trying to invest myself back into relationships with my friends and family. I'm trying to keep a running list of people I need to contact or see. Hopefully I'll have it down to an art soon, but right now it's kind of a mess. These things take time and emotional investment, which is why throwing myself into work is just so much easier at the moment. Work has become my distraction from the fact that I'm no longer in Dublin, no longer a stone's throw from mainland Europe, no longer across the pond. What I really need to do is take the piece of my heart that I left over there, get it back, and give it to those around me. I returned a phone call from four days ago today and I arranged lunch with another friend who has been trying to hang out with me for a week and a half now. For now consider it a work in progress.

A lot has been going on lately and in the midst of it all my Economic Development class sticks out the most. I just can't help but think about the rest of the world and how blessed I am to be where I am. People try to justify the reason for why we have life so good and others don't, I really feel like it's just luck of the draw. I've decided that no one gets what they deserve in life. No one deserves to be born into a developed country. No one deserves to be born into an underdeveloped country, but most of the world is. I feel like it's part of my duty to do something to help those out who are less fortunate. I've briefly, and I mean briefly, looked into the Peace Corps, not sure about it yet but I feel like it could be a viable option post graduation. Until then I'll just have to keep reading The Economist and focus a lot of energy on my project for Econ Dev which will focus on how the increase of enrolment in primary education in Sub-Saharan Africa would better their lives. Hopefully it'll turn out well and I'll be able to present it at the Economic Conference at Grove City College in June.

Well it's time to bake some cookies, finish laundry, and go to bed. Today was the one unproductive work day I've had since coming back, but I made some calls and sent some texts so I'm considering it productive in other ways.